By Guest Chris Dickens with edits from Jack Dickens

Welcome to another elusive guest blog post. If you are not a fan of meandering extended metaphors (analogy, allegory, zoomorphism? Not sure which literary device I am using), the summary is that Sophie and I joined a trip to Hawaii, and you should just enjoy the pictures.

Spouting:

Looking out at the ocean from our balcony you would typically see a whale spout every 30 seconds. The whale density is pretty extraordinary when you consider that, like icebergs, 90% of whales are not visible (don’t fact-check this). Flying into Maui it was cloudy and windy. Sophie went on a run at the airport and saw an army of turtles. They are organized, watch out. 

We were excited to see my parents but thought that our activities might be somewhat limited by a rainy forecast.

The Breach:

Our trip exploded into an awesome experience much like a whale shooting out of the water into the air. Too on the nose?

A break in the weather allowed our good family friend Beth to take us on an incredible hike. Winding through dense forest, scratching our shins, and trying to eliminate the invasive strawberry guava by eating every single one, we emerged at a truly breathtaking summit in the ʻĪao valley. The start of great weather and great fun.

SPLASH:

Not sure what it is called when whales slam back into the ocean but you get the point. The rest of the trip we were immersed in wonderful Maui experiences. We swam in the ocean at Makenna beach, ate at the famous Kihei cafe, and for our personal favorite, went whale watching on a sunset cruise. We also got to try a few new things: felt the mist at the Nakalele blowhole, watched a local surf competition, and volunteered some time preparing meals .

Fluking:

Much like my putting on the 18th at the King Kamehameha golf course, our trip was all over the place. See, even my non-animal similes are ham-fisted.

After a high paced vacation, Sophie and I said goodbye, but just for a little while. I’m not sure what 30 minutes in whale-time translates to in human-time, but in the ripples, we left cousins Gretchen and Chris P. to keep the cycle going.

Jim Dickens  February 12, 2024

Usually, I do a lot planning for vacation trips, but for the past month I let go of the reins and found out how great it is to go on the agenda of your trusted family and friends. I’ll be 70 in 8.5 years so Lori and I continued on our quest to have two summers a year. We are south while Northern Illinois does winter.

Our old friends Denise and Darrin invited us to stay with them at their condo in San Jose del Cabo, Mexico. Denise is a master planner and I just let go and went with her agenda. It was marvelous. We played a wonderful golf course, toured the local Bay of California waters, and went to really cool restaurants for dinner. Learning what is happening as it happens instead of researching and planning to know ahead of time was new and differently enjoyable. Almost like getting happy surprises. 

The four of us were on a boat out in the water sitting on the bow when a large humpback whale breached completely out of the water some 75 yards away. When I say out I mean tail and head out at the same time out. After seeing whales maybe 30 times, this was the most spectacular event I’ve witnessed. Lori and I kept following others plans as we stayed south.

A week after returning from Cabo we went south into the Caribbean Lesser Antilles to St John Island for two weeks. Two other couples joined us for the first week and our children with partners joined us for the next one. We had a nice villa on the hill looking over Cruz Bay to the sunset.

Our old friends, Ron & Cris and Tim & Kate planned our first week. Kate and Cris arranged for a sunset cruise, Lime Out, hiking, beach visits and dinners out.  Ron and Tim did geography, history and politics lectures. It was excellent to experience the island through their viewpoint.

On the sunset cruise, our eccentric captain, Jason, served us his own version of the local cocktail, a Pain Killer. Not sure what amount of alcohol and other drugs were in them but they had an immediate and significant effect causing Tim to do creative photography, Ron to lead a dance party back at the villa and me to get into a rare and confusing disagreement with Lori. The cruise was both a rose and thorn of the trip.

Daughter Emily and partner Zak are both practicing engineers and they built a precise schedule of events carefully researched. Luckily the agenda had little overlap with the previous week so new interesting stuff. Son Jack and wife Shelby came from their home in England. Their role was to be calm and carry on despite jet lag.

St John has very popular snorkeling and the popular areas have gotten worn out. Hurricanes Irma and Maria in 2017 have left a mark that still persists. However, Zak’s research uncovered that Salt Bay has a fresh reef a quarter mile off shore but in calm waters if you are willing to make the trip. We did and it was a highlight of the trip. I now have a great shared memory with Jack of our adventure together.

Letting go and trusting family and friends to set the agenda without interference is highly recommended. You gain new perspectives and do new things. So excellent!

by Jim Dickens            January 2, 2024

At my company, as with many companies, sometimes it needed to evolve or change. Once, the executive team was given a book called Switch by Chip and Dan Heath. We all read, discussed and mostly forgot it. But some of it stuck with me. In my own words, making change requires effort, discipline, persistence, and mind space. So attempting to make many simultaneous significant changes is bound to fail. With that in mind, I enter the New Year.

Instead of a lot of big ambitious well defined goals, I am going for an easy guideline with many ambiguous avenues for success.  Let’s call it New Ruts. Life is going well right now and most things beyond maintenance are squared away. Family, shelter, and finance are set for now. So it’s a perfect time to be incremental in improvement. I am going to stay in my current habits or in a rut and just do new things that are closely adjacent. If they are better than the old things, then I will switch into the new rut.

I am not sure on what all the new ruts are but here are a few examples under consideration. I do the old guy sports of golf and fly fishing so Pickleball is just a step away. Next door to fly fishing is fly tying so maybe. Eating is becoming a bigger deal as it does for many as you get older so maybe becoming proficient at cooking. The guideline takes the place of difficult, unpleasant, doomed to fail New Year’s resolutions.

In October, a well meaning but misguided Mexican airport security guard confiscated my saltwater flies. I head back to Mexico in a few days and have started tying flies for the trip so 2024 New Rut success is off to a good start. 

by Jim Dickens                 December 20, 2023

Somewhere around December 21st, is the darkest day in the northern hemisphere. Cloudy with low sun angle and the latest sunrise and earliest sunset characterize that day. There are many traditions and religious holidays old and new that brighten these dark days. I think a lot of it is by design. Reflecting back on 2023 in these dark days, the uplift I get comes from a different direction, my wife, Lori. She is the brightest light on the darkest day.

Our two sons got married this year and marriage has occupied a large amount of thought space. My opinion is that marriage is almost always your most important relationship beyond children and parents. You will spend more time with your spouse than any other human. You are tied legally together so that all significant decisions need to be done together. Your spouse will have huge impact on how good or bad living life is.

Reflecting back, Lori has propelled our lives forward instead of holding them back. She has taken joy in my joy as we have traveled the world this year. She was game to do things she didn’t think she would do like riding a helicopter on to a glacier then mountaineering on it. She sent me on fishing trips and was happy when I had a good one. She tried to see things from my perspective as we decided how to participate in weddings. Lori is the spouse who builds you up instead of dragging you down.

In these dark days, spending time with Lori is what brightens them most.

Last Goggle Text

My ironwoman niece in law, gave me a pair of excellent swim goggles on Lake Chelan, WA after looking at my 20 year old yellowed goggles in dismay. Since that time, July of 2022, I texted her pictures from places I use them. In 2023, they have been in the Pacific and Atlantic oceans, the Tasman, Flores and Caribbean seas, the California and Mexico Gulfs, and numerous lakes and pools. The last stop of 2023 was the Gulf of Mexico off Marco Island, FL.

I am back home in Naperville, IL in December catching my breath, although the cold grey days have me making plans already. I plan not to venture quite so far abroad in 2024 and getting that pick up taking me on the road.

Still Traveling

Somehow I managed to only be home a few days in October. It was lots of fun with family, fishing and large mammals. Park City to Bozeman to Naperville to Baja, Mexico, to Naperville to San Francisco to Reno to Naperville.

Of interest was Baja, Mexico. My friend Pete was invited because of a cancellation to join a group of bluegrass musicians and their friends. I was invited to join Pete because his girlfriend cancelled. The trip to the Bahia de los Muertos was a mix of lows and highs and little in between. For example, our driver from the airport fell asleep and ran off the road crashing through a road sign shattering van windows, a low. The blue grass musicians were world class with many grammys and played tremendously every evening, a high. The slide show below has more of the highs.

The other travel was great and stuff I usually do. So here are a few pics from the various locales. The captions have comments of note.

Having friends and family taking you on adventures is the best.

Scotland to Utah

Our son, Jack, and his fiancé, Shelby married. With two weddings and chairing a charity event completed, whew, I went fishing.

Shelby and Jack planned a great wedding and had unScottish, warm and sunny, weather supporting it. Ninety or so people shared a weekend at Thirlestane Castle in the Scottish borderlands. There was a welcome party with lawn games Friday. Then we had golf, hiking and archery Saturday before the wedding. Post wedding there was a fine dinner in the castle ball room and raucous live music and dancing in the courtyard. The wedding ceremony itself had a Roddy the Piper play us into our seats and a welcoming officiant, Sandy, performed a wonderful warm humanist ceremony. We got to spend some quality time with Shelby’s marvelous family. Officially married, success!

With the events of July, August, and September over and Lori off to Germany with her sister Susie, I golfed and fished the balance of the month as a form of recovery. I stayed in Scotland a few days, then at home in Naperville and then out to northern Utah to finish out the month.

Retirement hectic stress

In retirement you relax but August proved to be jam packed with stuff that had to be done in August. I was co chair of the 50th anniversary Illinois Trout Unlimited celebration, my mom had a birthday and my son, Jack was about to married.

I am bad at event planning due to ennui. I don’t care if there are round tables or what do we do if it rains. Also when I’m responsible, I am unusually stressed about the unknown of events, like will people show up and will the entertainment be good. This is especially true of an event never done before like a 50th Anniversary. Luckily, I had a co chair, Kevin, who had confidence and experience. We soldiered through and had 200 people show up. The Trout Unlimited CEO spoke, the band sounded good, food trucks were used, children’s games worked, our partners handed out prizes and the weather was sunny. Success!

Mom and Dad have birthdays 3 days apart and this August was my mom’s first birthday without Dad. So I went to Philadelphia to see Mom for 92 . I added an extension to Stone Harbor, NJ to see some good friends, Dan, Steve and Dave, the beach and some Atlantic City golf over 24 hours.

My son, Jack, and his fiancé, Shelby decided to get married in Scotland, Labor Day Weekend. So the last week in August we headed across the pond to Stirling and Edinburgh for some pre wedding fun with friends and family. I like Scotland because while it has cool old stones, it also has affordable golf, great hiking and lots of elbow room. Its people are really nice as well. We rented cars and did walking around touristy stuff.

Once back in Edinburgh, right before heading for the wedding and celebrations, we had dinner with Shelby’s family. They are great, friendly, kind humans who are comfortable and fun to have a wedding with. We were staying in Scotland to start off September.

Big events with accountability, lots of travel and little time in between made it a hectic month. The plethora of great people and great experiences without disasters made it very enjoyable. On to September and another wedding.

Escaping Purgatory

I have always said, “Being engaged is being in purgatory. Get married as soon as you can.”

Son, Chris and fiancé, Sophie did just that. After finding out that our other son, Jack, wanted to get married in September as well, Sophie and Chris, decided to get married sooner rather than later. For a number of reasons, they decided on a micro wedding in Bali, Indonesia. Parents and siblings, a party of 12, would attend in early July.

From Chicago, Bali is far, 22 hours of flying, 12 hour time difference, crossing the international date line and the equator far. It’s also exotic and beautiful. And, as I have mentioned in a previous post, Sophie’s family is a joy to be with. Despite the distance, we really looked forward to the trip. We stayed at a jungle resort next to a waterfall that was luxurious and beautiful with the friendliest of staff. The cuisine was delicious with the opportunity to eat local dishes. Finally, there was a great lap pool some 30 meters in length.

In addition to the wedding day we spent some time as tourists. If you’re going that far then you should extend which we did. Bali has lots and lots of temples, mostly Hindu, monkeys and waterfalls. The whole wedding party enjoyed it immensely despite some inclement weather, rain.

The wedding itself was intimate and warm. Ben, Sophie’s brother in law, and Jack, Chris’s brother, conducted the ceremony. We were all invited to give blessings. Dinner with toasts and dancing after followed by a late night swim. It’s a really beautiful way to have a wedding.

It turns out that that Komodo National Park is only a few major Indonesian islands away from Bali. Just a quick two hour flight and our family less Chris and Sophie were in Labuan Bajo, Flores Island, Indonesia. It is farthest I have ever felt from home. Tourists are almost all Chinese or Indian and the few Americans there are young free spirits. Indonesia has thousands of islands to police so the rule of law is tenuous.

Zak and Emily planned out our adventure. We hiked up to a cool promontory, snorkeled at a pink sand beach with the best coral I’ve ever seen, and yes, we took a guided walk and saw dragons.

I have a low bar for weddings. Did they successfully get married? Sophie and Chris did way better than that. They brought two families together and started a wonderful life for themselves. They did it in six months from engagement to wedding escaping purgatory quickly!